Confidence and Climbing Through Uncertainty
by Seth Simonds
I feel like this a lot of the time:
This picture was taken a few weeks ago during a hike up Mt. Washington in New Hampshire. (4,000 vertical feet, 8 mile round trip) People my size (I still have 100+ lbs to lose) and fitness level don’t climb Mt. Washington. They drive their car up and lose their breath climbing the 60 steps from the parking lot to the summit. Somehow, I made it. That story is for another time though.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what drives me in my pursuit of better health. Why am I doing this now and not years ago? What is it about my current circumstances that allows me to enjoy healthy food and take pleasure in how I feel after strenuous exercise? (Notice I didn’t say during strenuous exercise. I’m a pitiful wreck mid-workout.)
I decided it wasn’t the circumstances. Nothing “allows” me to do this. I’ve chosen it. Did something happen in January that caused me to make the choice? Not that I can remember. I’ve had no near-death experience to inspire a healthier lifestyle. I’m not the middle-aged man who survives a heart attack and seeks health through vivid fear.
I simply want things to change. Once I’d identified the changes I wanted to make, it didn’t take long for me to get some knowledge about the basic tools and techniques required to making those changes. Healthy diet + consistent exercise = healthier Seth. The equation is simple. The execution is dreadfully tedious at times.
In order to brighten things up a bit, I’ve taken to jotting down post-workout notes each day.
Yesterdays:
There is no trainer with voice enough to call out more loudly than the voice inside me calls out for freedom from this bulbous carcass I’ve enslaved it in.
I’m really disappointed by how slow I was today though. No, that’s not entirely true. I was more disappointed by how little I pushed myself. You might think it’s a push for me to be doing this at all…but it’s not. You see, I have this image in my mind of what it’ll be like to run. Fast, flying along with powerful strides. Confident. That’s it, isn’t it? Confidence?
Yes, I write like that when I’m still out of breath and soaked with perspiration. I actually thought the “bulbous carcass” line was pretty good in light of how I view myself. You see, “bulbous” = round while “carcass” really demonstrates my belief that my body is something I have control over.
Michel Angelo took a giant block of stone and figured out a way to combine a few simple tools with his knowledge of sculpting to give “David” to the world.
I have the tools, (exercise, diet) the knowledge, (why some things tend to work while others don’t) and a huge block of me to sculpt. It’s an adventure and I know I’ll make it so long as I keep chipping away.
And what about the confidence? I leave that to you. When you envision yourself at peak health, (think lifestyle, not a specific weight) what is the feeling you imagine first and foremost?
If you have to choose between leaving a comment or drinking a glass of water, choose the water. =)
Comments
Serenity. Peak health for me means taking life in stride and being constructive, even if that means sitting quietly and ruminating over something rather than taking immediate action. As much as I want to be actively working toward a goal/moving toward a destination, it’s those times when I’m comfortable just “being” that I know I’m on the right track. The yang of waiting that balances the yin of acting.
Thanks for another thought-provoking post.
Ahh, yes. To enjoy. To be. An old missionary friend of my parents once told me that the 4 most important words in the bible were “be still and know.” I’d always found that interesting. I’m glad you’ve reminded me of it!
Thanks for your consistent insight. Truly.
I hope you didn’t skip out on that glass of water! =)
No, I had one just in case. Tokyo’s water is filtered five times, making water from the tap as tasty as the bottled stuff being flogged. Cheers!
What do I envision.
Myself.
Crosslegged on floor.
Mid-mediatation.
Calm.
Present.
Strong as hell.
Capable.
And old.
80+
Vibrant.
Still going.
Drinking
A juice box.
Amazing picture. Amazing story about Mt. Wash. And frankly, I’m very impressed you’re taking this on period, to say nothing of it being in public (I tend to be pretty open here too, so that surprises me least). Good for you Seth. Keep this up and you’re going to make me quit smoking in public – where you don’t really have the opportunity for graceful failure.
(note: i’m down to about 8 a day, but damn – it’s a mofo).
Clarity of mind
Alertness without coffee
Legs that make Tom drool
Your post reminded me of one my favorite quotes by Michelangelo “I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.” You can substitute “angel” with “healthy man” and “marble” with “bulbous carcass” and “carved” with “worked on/endured/focused” to make it fit your goal.
I think peak health is believing in who you are, no matter what your weight or BMI is. If you are 100 pds lighter, but still think of yourself at your former weight, how healthy are you really? You have to own your new body, mentally, to be at peak health.
Your journey is incredibly inspiring Seth. Thank you for sharing it with us.
It took a long time for me–too long–to get to the point of choosing to make the changes. I’m so glad I did: I finally know what “peak health” feels like. It’s a joyful, confident, contented feeling. It’s how I feel after a good workout in which I know I’ve given my best effort. Not usually *during* the workout for me, either (unless I power up a steep-looking hill on my bike and think, “THAT’S why I do spin class!”). And maybe not always the sweating-like-mad part immediately after…unless it’s the “thank heaven I’m with all those @#$#%#$% burpees!” exhileration. It usually settles over me after I’ve showered and had something healthy to eat.
I envision doing what I’m doing for the rest of my life, because I want to keep that feeling going for as long as I’m alive. (In other words, the adventure doesn’t have a destination, really.) Best wishes for your continuing adventure!
The Mt. Washington story gets even crazier. I have some videos, too. =)
I don’t have any choice but to take this on. If I don’t do it now, I’m not sure I ever will. I have the time. I have the resolve. I have the resources. I’d be an idiot not to do it now.
Ahh, smoking. But I can’t quit food cold turkey! =) Good luck, Jim!
I’m completely off caffeine. That means that when I do need a synthetic pick-me-up, coffee actually works. It’s awesome!
You have fun with your drooling Tom! =P