#357 Haydee

by Seth Simonds

Dear Haydee,

Today is my birthday. The shortest day of the year. The first day of winter. The day Druids dragged pretty girls from castles and sacrificed them in the hope that the sun would return for an other summer.

Unfortunately for you, I’m not afraid of the cold and have good low-light vision. Early on this winter solstice, I was the castle, the druids, and the deepening silence. You were the chubby princess that didn’t want to go for a late night walk between the pools of light cast by tall street lamps.

How about a run? It’d be fun!

We could act out a scene from the Wizard of Oz. You could scream, “I’m melting!” as I perspire until you disappear.

You didn’t want to go for a run. You wanted to stay home and eat red velvet cake with chocolate coconut frosting. You wanted to luxuriate in mashed potatoes, fresh garlic bread, and hot apple pie with rivulets of vanilla cream running from the big scoop of vanilla ice cream on top.

Not a chance, darling!

I hummed a bit from Mme. Butterfly as I tied my shoes. New Balance with the knobby laces that don’t come untied. I stepped outside and locked the door behind me. I put the key in my pocket, turned to the darkness, and became a verb.

“Haydee” is also the name of Edmund Dantes’ companion in The Count of Monte Cristo. She is the one whose belief and unwavering affection pull Dantes back from the brink of vengeful insanity. She is the one who stands beside him as he distills all the wisdom of humanity into two words–”Wait and hope.”

Silly Dantes! I have hope because I stopped waiting!

Perhaps Dumas (the book’s author) was wrong and you weren’t so good for Dantes after all? Perhaps you were holding him back, too?

Dumas isn’t alive for me to ask him about what really happened after Haydee and Edmund sailed off into the distance. I know how our story ends, though. It ends with me jogging off into the sunrise while you mourn the loss of such a lovely man.

I am, you see. A lovely man. There’s just 68 pounds less of me to celebrate this birthday than there was for my last.

Kinda makes me feel like river dancing.

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